Vyabhicharo Na Kartavyaha – Neither sex should ever behave adulterously says the Lord. Males should not hanker after women and women should not hanker after men. Thus, there should not be even needless association between the two sexes.
Manu explains the consequence of such acts. ‘Adulterous women in this world are defamed and slandered. She is endowed with sin and great sickness befalls her. She is then reborn upon this Earth after death as a fox or a jackal. Similar consequence befalls a man who is adulterous also.’
It is written that ‘Those fools who look upon other women with lustful intent are reborn blind upon this Earth. Endowed with wicked qualities they then face great suffering and sickness upon the Earth.’
Shrimad Bhagwat explains these tortures of Hell, ‘Adulterous women go to a Hell called Taptasurmi. There she is beaten with clubs and then forced to embrace a burning hot statue of a man repeatedly. A similar consequence awaits an adulterous man. Therefore one should not even dream of or fantasise of adulterous acts.’
The veto of adulterous behaviour and association with another woman is considered as a basic Dharma to be followed by all – it is a fundamental directive
‘Kama’ – lust or desire is very destructive. It can in an instance drive a person away from the truth and righteousness, towards dishonesty and corruptness. It is extremely attractive and seductive to all. It is beyond reasoning and common sense. We all can quite easily fall servant to desire, disregarding everything else in a pursuit to satisfy our desires.
Equipped with intelligence, cool mind and even the truth, we are still not able to conquer desire. Lust for the opposite sex is that much more seductive and enticing. Even the God’s and Rishis have fallen servant to it and the results have been extremely damaging. Lord Swaminarayan here forbids any adulterous behaviour. Indeed Shastras forbid a man from even socialising with other women.
Men may often say that ‘she is a friend’ and that ‘I do not have any lustful intent with her’ and thus try and approve such contact with the opposite sex. However, as explained, no one has conquered lust except Narayana and though you may feel that lust does not come into question, you never can tell and relax in such situations.
We must be very careful in social situations and never let such thoughts enter our mind.
Recent studies have shown people are waiting longer to get married. They are also divorcing more rapidly and that the lengths of marriages are falling. Research shows that Adultery did play a part in marriage divorces: 23 percent of divorces were awarded to women for his adultery and 39 percent to men for her adultery. Thus we can see that in the West, marriage is seriously under threat. We must all be very careful that we do not become a statistic through lustful behaviour by never even letting the thought of Adultery enter our minds.
This fundamental fact should be instilled in our younger generation by teaching them that marriage is a sacred event and that we should wait for marriage in order to have a relationship with the member of the opposite sex. Before that time we must stay pure and free from the clutches of lust.
Many may think that the Lord here forbids adultery that applies only to the married, and so the younger generations are free to have relations with the other sex, but this is completely untrue. Before Grihastashram (married life) we are all bound by living in Brahmcharyashram (student life). In this ashram, Brahmacharya Vrata (vow of celibacy) must be taken and thus we are led to live a life of segregation – away from the opposite sex.
We are just as vulnerable to lust in our younger/teenage years as we are to it in our marriage years. Indeed these younger years are very important for they build and affect a person greatly. They mould a person preparing them for their later years and therefore it is imperative that they do not fall servant to desire and lust that could seriously compromise their marriage. This can only be done by following the teachings of Shastras that prescribe a strict rule of conduct of segregation of the sexes. In this day and age of sexually transmitted diseases such as AIDS and other killers, it is extremely important to refrain from acts of adultery.
A woman is not bad, a man is not bad either, it is their association which stirs up emotions and causes problems. It is just a matter of time that lust creeps in the purest of relations, and with the kind of movies and books becoming popular these days, it is almost impossible to keep conversations decent.The songs also describe the same nasty relationships which do force even the best persons to falter in this case. The constant hammering does take its toll on a person.
Hence be smart and avoid such inputs, listen to your parents when they say not to associate with the opposite sex.
Let me make it clear, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO STAY CLEAN WHILE BEING IN CONSTANT ASSOCIATION WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX.PERIOD.
It is impossible to maintain one’s chastity in the company of the opposite sex. Even the great philosophers and sages could not remain chaste. Lord Bramha, Lord Shiva, Demigod Indra, all have been tainted by lust. Are we greater than them? Let us not taste poison to check if it kills us or not!
-Taken From Shikshapatri “The epistle of Precepts” (Download)